Years ago, before I even had Danger girl, I was diagnosed with PCOS. Never heard of it? You can read about it here. To put it simply, it is an insulin resistance disease that attacks your ovaries leading to fertility issues, weight gain, more male hormones, etc. It was very hard to get pregnant with Danger and finally with the help of some medicine we did. Fast forward to the past 5 years, where I have been listening to my doctors tell me that getting pregnant wouldn’t be possible for various reasons. This is where I have been in my baby making days for a long time now. The past few months I felt the urge to push my family doctor to see another specialist downtown and finally she did.
I finally make it downtown to the hospital, navigate under ground parking, only to find myself in a waiting room full of really pregnant people. Pregnant people who were complaining they were pregnant. Oh the ankle swells. Oh the cravings. Oh the uncomfortable. Really? Did I really have to listen to this? Here I am willing to give anything (except my first born and my animals) to have another baby, to be pregnant again, to have all those wonderful yuckies about pregnancy they were all complaining about. I started to get mad. Furious at the world. Furious at the people who seemed unappreciated for this wonderful time in their life. I started to cry and then my name was called. Luckily, I was saved and did not have to hear or see those things.
I met with the new doctor for the first time. She is a general obgyn dr, which would explain all the pregnant people in the waiting room. The new doctor gave me hope. She gave me reasons why I could get pregnant and reasons why what the previous doctors had been doing was not real correct or healthy in treating my infertility as well as my overall women health. We have an action plan in place which is so promising. Even if I don’t get pregnant, knowing that I pushed for some answers and am doing all I can is a good start. I want to try even if the result isn’t what we had hoped for. The action plan will take a few months to get rolling. I have to get a few more tests done and then get an appointment with a fertility specialists. Once that is in place, I will really feel like I am making progress.
For right now, we are making baby steps and that is perfectly all right by me.